Thursday, February 22, 2007

Some Assembly Required

I am still on holidays. Work sitch is still unknown. I received a call from the office today but I did not get to the phone in time to answer it. I was freaking out so bad. Navy Guy had to calm me down. Yup, he is still here. He left on Sunday and he's back. But we're just friends. *sobs*

Anyways, I freaked out so I called my boss. She was dismissive and cold and said she was in a meeting. She never called me back so I am guessing that she did not call me using the office phone. 10 minutes later, a colleague called and asked me for something. I asked him whether it was him who called me earlier and he said it was not. But he did mention that someone else might have called. Cryptic.

I think he had someone from the office to call me but when they could not get me, he called using his cell. That's the story I am sticking to and I hope it would help me sleep tonight. I even checked my office mail from the intraweb application thingy but there was nothing earth shattering there. Phew!

Oh, and I'll update on Navy Guy when I get back from my vacaysh k? Later...

Friday, February 16, 2007

When She Was Bad

And now... for something completely different (coz I find it funny... my life is full of drama right now)...


1. If you are over thirty five and you have a washboard stomach, you are gay.It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the boys and have
spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups, aerobics, and doing the Oprah diet.

2. If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaaming homo. A cat is like a dog, but gay - it grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed. And just think about how you call a dog..."Killer, come here! I said get your ass over here, Killer!" Now think about how you call a cat..."Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!" Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so gay.

3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, baby pacifiers, or any such nonsense , rest assured, you are a Gaylord. A straight man only sucks on bar-b-que ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, crawfish guts, pickled pigs feet, or tits. Anything else and you are in training to suck El Dicko and undeniably a fag.

4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or piss in a parking lot, you crave a deep homosexual relationship . A man's world is his bathroom; he urinates where ever he pleases.

5. If you drink decaf coffee with skim milk, you're like a high hard one in the poop chute . Coffee is to be hard strong, black, and full aroma. A
straight man will never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim" and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener tastes like. If you've had NutraSweet in your mouth, you've had a man there, too.

6. If you know more than six names of colors or four different types of dessert, you might as well be handing out free passes to your ass. A real man doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap as well as all the names of all the players in the Major league, NFL, NHL, college ball, PGA and NASCAR. If you can pick out chartreuse or you know what a "fressier" is you're gay. And if you can name ANY of textile other than denim, you are faggadocious.

7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it, you're dying to tune a meat whistle . A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-ass driver or to cut the punk off. The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat a hamburger, ho ld his beer, or play with his honey in the passenger seat.

8. If you enjoy romantic comedies or French films, mon-frere, vous le Gay, oui? The only time it is acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above films by yourself or with another man is likely to result in SHC (spontaneous homosexual combustion), which is what happens to fags when they flame
out too.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Prophecy Girl

I am still here. In the office. Have not received any news yet. The suspense is killing me. Sigh.

In other news, Navy Guy and I have been planning his itinerary and we've been talking on the phone. Company phone. Heheheh. Hey, I might be fired so might as well just misuse it yeah?

Anyway, I happened to mentioned that I have not seen him for three weeks and I kinda miss him. He grew quiet. Distant. Avoidy? It was the case of perfect timing or worst timing when my boss came in so I had to end to conversation.

I SMSed him but he had yet to reply. This was during lunchtime. It's almost 4 now. Methinks it's a bad sign. Sigh. Me and my big mouth. Should have just kept quiet and let it be. But it's not like I was pressuring him or anything. Is it wrong for one friend to miss another friend? Sigh.

Maybe he's so turned off that he'd cancel the trip to KL? With my luck right now, anything's possible.

I need to do something, other than work of course, ehhehe. I can't just sit here and wait. I am so antsy right now. Speaking of, I've been piled with lotsa work and I only have a couple of hours left before my vacaysh starts. Sigh. I can't concentrate with all that's going on. Help!

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Out of Sight, Out of Mind

Hi guys. Thanks for all the wishies and the concern. I am still employed at the moment. Facing the firing squad tomorrow. But things are not looking good here. Got everything going against me, including my own people. Sigh.

I am prepared, mentally anyways. Everything happens for a reason right?

Anyways, Navy Guy has confirmed with me that he is coming to KL and spending time with me!!! He got a friend to give him a ride and he'd arrive around dinner time. Yay!!! This made my day! My silver lining!! My light at the end of the tunnel! Ooh, just hope that this light at the end of the tunnel doesn't turn out to be a big honking train...

EDIT - Just as I hit the Publish button, Navy Guy SMSed me. He said things which are personal lar, eheheh, but at the very end of the message, he actual wrote "See you later buddy!" Does he still think of me as his good friend? Does this mean that I've no chances of having him as a bf? *sobs*

Tuesday, February 13, 2007


I haven't even gotten to this part of the Bitching Fit. I was just adviced by my boss that what had transpired yesterday was so big that one of the big kahunas is calling her in for a meeting.

What did I do? That would be explained in the second Bitching Fit. I am a wreck right now. Apparently they are talking of getting me fired. When my boss was not around, I am not capable of doing work and that there is no actual need for me to be in the unit if this is how things are gonna be.

I am prepared for the worst. Ya know, when I said my week's been hell... I did not know the half of it. Looks like I'll be unemployed soon. This time, I won't have the money to back me up.

To kick an already fallen girl, Navy Guy just informed me that bus tickets are all sold out. Apparently, it did not cross his mind that CNY is coming so he did not buy his ticket yet. Looks like he's not gonna be able to make it.

My darkest hour is looming. I don't think I have the strength to survive this.

The Puppet Show

I am having the worst couple of weeks ever. Well, okay, maybe not ‘ever’ but this has got to be in the top 3 for sure. After coming back from Merlion Country, everything was fine and dandy. Navy Guy and I were constantly communicating. I got some SGD left over from the trip (yay! Pocket money until salary time!). I got me 10 new perfumes to choose from (yup, went on a shopping spree and bought perfumes).

But then, I had to go back to work and things started going sour from there on out. There was a conference thingy that we had to help out and it was way out there in Putrajaya. However, it is not too far from the office so it’s not too bad. We got to stay there for one night. Suddenly, I am a high-flying jetsetter who goes around the world for my job. Me likey.

Now, for the glass half empty. The conference thingy was organized by a sub and not by my company. We were only meant to come in as backup support. However, we found that we had to work through the night while the team from the sub company actually went home! WTF?!

Also, I was suddenly appointed to be the repertoire. Um, I think that’s how it’s spelt. Ya know, the one who takes note of the seminar and do up the summaries. It is a very technical seminar. I do not have the skills and/or knowledge to summarize the seminar. Now, if the seminar was about f*gs, g*y sex, shopping, movies, entertainment or cooking, then maybe I would be a shoo-in.

I protested and asked to be relieved of the position. Nobody wanted to listen to my argument. I wanted to kill someone. Thank God the boss of the sub company is very cute and very nice. If not, I’d walked off already. Hehhehehe. *blushes*

Then I found out that they only booked us one room. Which is fine because there’s only two guys in my department. Yeah, right. Suddenly, I got news that there would be three more guys bunking with us. Son of a… OMG. At first I tried looking at it positively. One guy was positively hot. Hehehehehe. The others were, um, how do I put it nicely… not. One guy was quite the jackass. Just because he is more senior than the rest of us, that doesn’t mean he gets to have the single bed while the rest of us had to share beds or sleep on the floor.

Don’t even get me started on the smoking in a non-smoking room. It is alright, apparently, to smoke when there is two smokers and two non-smokers. The senior guy insisted that he should be able to smoke. By then, I was totally in bitchy mode so I just told them, “Crack open a window, I don’t want to choke on smoke to death!”

To be continued...

P/S – Sorry folks, had to interrupt the Karma article for this breaking bitchy fit.

Monday, February 12, 2007

I Robot, You Jane

A recent trip to the Rainbow Shop in Plaza D*mas saw my card getting its 10th stamped. This meant that I had successfully spent 300 bucks on gay-related DVDs. This also meant that I get 50 bucks rebate to spend on anything I’d like.

I chose to get me a magazine called Instinct which featured the cast of Dante’s Cove (Sept 06 edition), a new gay supernatural thriller. Yup, you read right. Gay and Supernatural. I wish that was what they had planned for Supernatural starring my husband Jensen Ackles. Oh, and cutie pie, Jared Padalecki.

Dante’s Cove is also one of the DVDs that I bought so it made sense for me to get the magazine with a feature article about the show, rather than some other magazine featuring a shirtless hunk on a moped.

There was a very good article in that edition about dating and how our actions would later bite us in the ass. It’s called Karma. I found it interesting since I have been having bad karma when it comes to dating and I need to reassess what I had done to break the whole bad karma thingy.

It’s quite a long article so I’ll be posting it piece by piece. A disclaimer before I do. I did not write this article. It is copyrighted to Instinct Magazine.

Dating Karma: Proceed With Caution (by Bob Kasunic)

As they say in life, what comes around goes around. But if you’re a gay man playing the dating game – trust me – it comes around a whole lot faster! (What? So I’ve dated a bit. Don’t throw stones.) So why is it, then, that in the Tao of dating we are all too willing to test the Karmic Laws of the universe, believing that what we do to others won’t be done to us, and then have the unmitigated gall (read: bitchiness) to get mad when it does?

Now, for those of you who think this has nothing to do with you (giggle, giggle), I ask two questions, young grasshoppers: 1) How many times have you told someone, “I’ll call you” when you never had any intention of making that call – even as the words passed your pursed lips? 2) How many times have you sat by the phone waiting for it to ring because he promised, “I’ll call you”? (I’m willing to bet some of you went so far as to call Ma Bell to have the line checked to make sure it was still working.)

Be forewarned: much like that unforgiving fluorescent lighting in your office, Karma’s a bitch! It is inevitable, and it will find you. Maybe not today or even next month, but rest assured – eventually it will. The point is, the more you know, the better your chance are to get it right and not lose the man of your dreams today for some silly mistakes you made last year.

There are four basic Laws of Karma that can help you on your quest to keep Mr. Right.

#1 – Players Get Played
#2 – Karma Trumps Dogma
#3 – Mind Your P’s and Q’s
#4 – Just Say “No… Thank You”

Intrigued? I know I was. Hehehehe.

To be continued...

Friday, February 9, 2007


Navy Guy and I have been keeping in touch. He was quiet for one week. I think he was too busy being in love with his man to even bother with me. Suddenly, he found himself in a pickle. His guy was ignoring him and was not returning messages or picking up calls.

He called me Sunday morning. I was out all night with my friends, bowling and stuff. Then I went about watching Dreamgirls. Just as I was about to fall asleep, he called me. I did not recognize the number. I think he was using his house phone.

He said he just came back from Ipoh with his friends and they had been out all night. He was so upset at this new turn of events. I was sympathetic but also angry. How could a sane person do this to him? He had chosen you, you effing moron. He is hot, cute, nice, romantic, loyal, hot, cute, nice body, nice ass, hot, cute and romantic. Have I mentioned that he is hot? Yes, I am in love/lust with him.

I am so pissed at this guy. Not my Navy Guy. The guy that NG is head over heels for. I so wanna slap him. It’s so easy for them to get guys that they just take for granted the really good catch? Gurls like me have to work so hard just to get a decent date!

Anyway, ever since that fateful morning conversation, he and I kinda grew closer and we’ve been in touch every day. Via phone calls and SMSes. Not that anything’s ever gonna happen between us. He made that perfectly clear. He said that I was such a good friend, he did not wanna ruin it by getting romantically involved. If things do not work out, then we might not be able to remain friends. He did not wanna lose me.

A part of me went, “Awww, that’s so sweet,” while the other part of me went “WTF?!”

Anywho, I told him about my trip to the Merlion Country and that I got him a souvenir. He said that he might go to KL for CNY coz his family would be around here at that time. I told him I just needed to pass him the souvy and that’s it. Don’t wanna take up too much of his time. He’d want to spend it with his lover. Note venomous tone there.

Then he confessed. He’d be spending the first few days of CNY break over there coz the lover wanted to visit him there. After the break is over, he’d go see his family. There goes my chances of meeting him. Dammit.

Two days ago, he said that he had some bad news. I hate it when the conversation starts with that. But it turned out to be bad news for him. His lover broke it off with him, after he had tried to contact him several times unsuccessfully. Suddenly, NG’s plans all changed. He is coming to KL to meet me and spend time with me. And of course to get his souvy. I was quite happy. It only lasted for a minute.

After we ended the conversation, I felt weird. The bad kind. It seemed that I am about to be the rebound girl, ain’t I? His plans did not even include me, but now that he has been dumped, he finally realizes that I had been there for him this whole time and wanted to be with me. Second choice? Again? And again? And again? Sigh. What do I do? Meet him still? Or go back to see my family during the holidays? So confused…

Thursday, February 8, 2007

The Pack

Work has been so hectic. I have yet to get a decent rest from all this running around. I still have the bug from a couple of weeks bag. Sometimes I cough and my nose gets stuffed up. I seriously need a vacation. I am tired. Looking forward to CNY break. Hopefully I'd be able to get in a lot more vacation time because I had to work during Thaipusam/Federal Territory Day. Not to mention that weekend. Sigh.

Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Never Kill A Boy On A First Date

The new season of American Idol has officially started. I love American Idol! I was actually in the US when Kelly Clarkson was crowned as the first Idol.

I dunno why but I’ve never really gotten interested in the reality shows in Malaysia. I did try to follow Malaysian Idol but Jaclyn Victor? Lame. Okay, okay, maybe she’s not that lame, what with her Surround Sound Voice and all. However, I do need to point out that she’s utterly unable to do the SSV thingy (ya know, where she would hold the microphone over her head or five meters off the side of her face) ever since she clinched the title. If you don’t believe me, watch her in Juara Lagu where she was singing Gemilang. She jazzed it up a bit and she could not perform it as she did on MI.

Don’t even get me started on Daniel. He’s cute lar but cute is not enough to be an Idol. Okay, maybe he got a competent singing voice but still. Competent should not be enough.

I really don’t like Akademi Fantasia. One friend said the reason why I did not like AF is because AF is catered to the typical Malay. Sexcuse me? Am I not Malay enough? He said I was not and that I am more contemporary and Americanized. Wuteva. But seriously, look at all the winners. Vince? Okay only lor. Zahid? Can’t really sing an original composition, except lately. Mawi? Sawi? Color me bored. Faizal? Who?

One in a Million. Now that is a concept. But why is Dayang Nurfaizah in it? I know, I know, it was all sexplained already but she’s an award-winning, accomplished veteran with several albums under her belt. Hardly seems fair. What would it do for Dayang’s career? A win would not really help. She’s already a big enough name. Losing would be bad for her, in my opinion. In the end, she did lose.

Anyways, getting back to American Idol. Each season would produce at least one superstar. Kelly Clarkson has gone on to win awards. Jennifer Hudson just got a Golden Globe. Carrie Underwood is carving a niche in the country market. I think Katharine McPhee would be the breakout star from last season, even though she lost the Idol crown to that spastic Taylor Hicks.

This season so far has been weak. The initial auditions have not really shown us any potential winners. Although there were a few good ones, mostly from the girls. There were also a few good looking boys that made me drool. There was one boy, Jerry or something. 16 years old but smokin’ hot. Good voice too. Paula was squirming in her seat like she had inserted a vibrator in her pussycat doll. You could always tell when Paula Jr. is speaking when Paula acts all modest and coy and blushing.

People never give her credit. She’s really a good actress. She could act normal, okay slightly normal, even when she’s stoned out of her mind. And she could still let Paula Jr. do the talking in that condition too. I have new level of respect for Paula’s professionalism.

Monday, February 5, 2007

Teacher's Pet

I dunno why I bother but I went on a date about two weeks ago. I have met him before, when he was seeing one of my friends. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it), it did not work out for them.

So my date, Navy Guy, is single. We chatted online and he said he might come by KL and spend a few days. I did not really thought about it much since I was far, far busy with work. Plus, I have a wedding to go and my whole family was driving up to KL. So I thought I won’t be able to have a life that weekend.

But NG SMSed me and asked if I was free to meet him. I snatched the opportunity immediately and went to meet him. It was a good date. At least I thought so. We kept in touch. He’s having problems with the one he is seeing right now. I tried broaching the subject of me and him dating but he completely shot me down. In a nice, beating round the bush way.

I knew his type was the older, more matured guys so I was just taking a chance and put my heart on my sleeve. The gamble did not pay off. I am a little sad. But it’s not like I’ve emotionally invested in this thing right?

The one he is seeing right now is totally ignoring him and taking him for granted but yet, he is still hanging on to him. How stupid is this guy? A hot, nice, cute, tall, sexy man wants him and he pushes them away. People like me have to completely suffer just to get the attention of one of them but these people just brush them off. What is wrong with this world?

Anyways, I have had it. Too many rejections. I am simply not good enough to be with anybody. I don’t really feel bad. I guess I have accepted my place. That I am destined to forever be the good friends, the one they seek to bitch and complain about the men they are seeing. Sigh.


If your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be like? So, here's how it works:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, etc).
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press Play.
4. For every question, type the song that's playing.
5. When you go to a new question, press the Next button.
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.
7. Don't skip songs.

P/S – I had to do this twice since the first time I did it, I forgot to take out the Malay songs (especially Raya songs).


1. Opening Credits:
Vogue – Madonna
(alt: Love Before Time – Coco Lee)

I love Vogue as an opening. So Devil Wears Prada.

2. Waking Up:
My Love is for Real – Paula Abdul
(alt: Forever Your Girl)

Wah, both Paula Abdul songs. Hmmm…

3. First Day of School:
Akhirnya Kini Pasti – Anita Sarawak
(alt: Want Love – Hysteric Ego)

Want Love is better. So upbeat and catchy.

4. Fight Song:
Home – Michael Buble
(alt: Milk and Toast and Honey – Roxette)

Erk? Why my fight songs all lovey dovey ballads? Apparently I am a pansy.

5. Breaking Up:
Wajah – Jaclyn Victor
(alt: In the Shadows – The Rasmus)

Wajah is a sad song but not really for breakup. In the Shadows much more appropriate I think.

6. Happiness:
Selamat Hari Raya – Ahmad Jais
(alt: Better the Devil You Know – Kylie)

Selamat Hari Raya is a cheery song, unless you’re in a foreign country celebrating Eid all alone. Kylie’s is a bit more upbeat and cheery.

7. Life's Okay:
Are You Gonna Be My Girl? – Jet
(alt: Hold On – Wilson Phillips)

Wilson Phillips all the way.

8. Mental Breakdown:
Your Winter – Sister Hazel
(alt: Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel – Tavares)

My alt song choice is very weird. Apparently I would go all psychedelic when I have my mental breakdown

9. Driving:
I’ll Be There – Solid Harmonie
(alt: I’ve Seen It All – Schiller)

Solid Harmonie’s is nice for driving. Schiller’s is far too laidback. My car would be wrapped around a tree by the time this song is over.

10. Flashback:
Batas Menanti – Fauziah Latiff
(alt: What’s Up Lonely – Kelly Clarkson)

Both songs are big ballads. Means my movie is about love lost or something. Sigh.

11. Getting Back Together:
How Could An Angel Break My Heart – Toni Braxton
(alt: All Cried Out – Allure)

Wha? My Getting Back Together songs are both songs about heartache and being left by the partners. Sigh.

12. Wedding:
Bertakhta Di Hati – Faradhiya
(alt: Inside Your Heaven – Carrie Underwood)

Both are quite good for weddings. Me happy.

13. Birth of a Child:
Justice League Unlimited Theme
(alt: Wind It Up – Gwen Stefani)

Either my child will be a superhero or it would be a Swedish yodeler. Both are scary thoughts.

14. Final Battle:
Menari Denganku – Sarah/Zahid
(alt: I Wanna Spend My Lifetime Loving You – Marc Anthony/Tina Arena)

The first one is not really appropriate. The Zorro song is better.

15. Death Scene:
Crush – Jennifer Paige
(alt: Stickwitu – The Pussycat Dolls)

Oooh, I love me some Dolls.

16. Funeral Song:
Seminggu Berhari Raya – Senario
(alt: The Real Thing – Bo Bice)

My funeral songs suck. Sad now.

17. End Credits:
Somewhere Out There – James Ingram/Linda Ronstadt
(alt: Do I Make You Proud? – Taylor Hicks)

Nice songs. I dun like the spastic Hicks but his voice is nice and the song is not bad.

Anyone else game to try?

The Harvest

Work has been too hectic these days for me to write anything. I had just came back from Singapore (for a work-related thingy) and by tomorrow, I’d be over in Putrajaya for another work-related thingy.

Maybe things would slow down a bit after the Putrajaya event. I’ll be staying in Putrajaya tomorrow. I am hoping there would be free wifi and I would able to update on the Singapore trip (and some flirtage initiated by a cute straight guy from Petron*s).