Hush

Crush. An intense yet short lived infatuation. These past couple of months, I have been crushing quite a lot. Does this mean I am easy? Or am I just slutty?

Crush #1 – Chinese Guy from Maluri with a sexy voice.
I chatted with him early this year but we only got to meet up in June. He invited me to a ‘party’, ehehehe. From the MMS that he sent, he seemed like a kid but he was the same age as me. 21. Add 8 more years. Sigh.

And he kept insisting on meeting my other chub friends. So it was a turn off early on. However, since he was the one organizing the party, I decided to join. Man, I wished I would have joined earlier. Hehehe.

He is tall. Me likey. Not too quick on the uptake though but maybe he’s just not used to American humor. Not many people are. But he has a boyfriend. Or he’s divorcing one boyfriend and wants to shack up with another. So I just get to play during that tiny window of singledom. Sigh.

Crush #2 – Cute Malay Guy from Shah Alam
I have chatted with him before and I was on his Myspace, before I deleted that profile. Now, he’s disappeared from Myspace. Dammit. But I got to meet him when my friends and I went to watch Harry Plopper and the Order of the Jean Grey.

He was extremely cute, quiet, unassuming and did I mention extremely cute? I knew who he was immediately. But I was kinda shy so I just kept it to myself. Teddy, who apparently was not crushing on anyone, totally engaged me in a conversational duel, right in front of him. I was kinda embarrassed but I sucked it up and acted normally.

Did I mention he is extremely cute? A bit shorter than me though. It’s okay, I’ll just bend my knees if I wanna kiss him… oh, oops, my bad… fantasy stuff in my head…

However, I got a little break and a little luck later on because my friends and I are planning something for the Merdeka weekend and his email was included in the discussion. Slightly later on, I got a bunch of forwards from my friends and I got one from him. Or so I thought it was him. I asked, he confirmed and we’ve been emailing each other back and forth. *gurly shrieks*

Unfortunately, he is in a loving relationship… so I just get to crush on him and just ogle. Sigh. The boyfriend is such a lucky bitch.

Crush #3 – The Malay Guy from Tun Razak
The one that came over on Monday. The one from Guys4Men. He is as tall as me. Nice. Cute. Knows how to please a man. Hehehehe.

I guess the reason I got crushed was because he stuck around afterwards. He knows songs that I know. Yup, he checked out my iTunes and remembers the old songs from my childhood. He smelled nice. Sigh.

Not to mention Cute Cashier Guy and the tall dude from my office… sigh…

Teacher's Pet

I dunno why I bother but I went on a date about two weeks ago. I have met him before, when he was seeing one of my friends. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it), it did not work out for them.

So my date, Navy Guy, is single. We chatted online and he said he might come by KL and spend a few days. I did not really thought about it much since I was far, far busy with work. Plus, I have a wedding to go and my whole family was driving up to KL. So I thought I won’t be able to have a life that weekend.

But NG SMSed me and asked if I was free to meet him. I snatched the opportunity immediately and went to meet him. It was a good date. At least I thought so. We kept in touch. He’s having problems with the one he is seeing right now. I tried broaching the subject of me and him dating but he completely shot me down. In a nice, beating round the bush way.

I knew his type was the older, more matured guys so I was just taking a chance and put my heart on my sleeve. The gamble did not pay off. I am a little sad. But it’s not like I’ve emotionally invested in this thing right?

The one he is seeing right now is totally ignoring him and taking him for granted but yet, he is still hanging on to him. How stupid is this guy? A hot, nice, cute, tall, sexy man wants him and he pushes them away. People like me have to completely suffer just to get the attention of one of them but these people just brush them off. What is wrong with this world?

Anyways, I have had it. Too many rejections. I am simply not good enough to be with anybody. I don’t really feel bad. I guess I have accepted my place. That I am destined to forever be the good friends, the one they seek to bitch and complain about the men they are seeing. Sigh.