Bargaining Part 1

#1 Crush's birthday is coming up. I've planned to have a celebratory dinner with him the night before his actual birthday. Ya know, so that if other people such as colleagues, family members or the boyfriend would wanna take him out to celebrate, they could. He'd be free to celebrate with them.

He has confirmed that the dinner is on. Yay! I am so happy. Unfortunately, his birthday came at such an unfortunate timing. I was told that some of the claims that was due to me is not actually claimable. Like the PWTC gig. 10 days worth of allowances gone down the drain, even though I already got some allowance from the parent company and also from the organisers. But when I asked my boss, she said I could still claim. Sigh.

So starting last week (and even the weekend), I am watching my spending and not going out as much so that I could go celebrate #1 Crush's birthday. Not that I wanna spend that much money, but at least a decent restaurant. It's not often I get to celebrate the birthday of someone I am in love with. Yes, that's right. Even after all these years, I've never been with anyone that long to celebrate a birthday or even an anniversary. Sigh.

I am still at a loss as to what to give #1 Crush for a birthday present. I am sure my undying love and loyalty doesn't count. Right? Hehehehe...

Yeah, even though he knows how I feel about him, it's kinda awkward to be saying it out loud.

I got him a DVD. Is that a good present? It's his favorite movie. Double Disc Special Edition Director's Cut. I actually had bought it a long time ago but when I bought it, I had #1 Crush in mind. And I think he's seen the DVD on my shelves whenever he came over. Is that tacky? Giving a present that's been bought a long time ago? Anyway, I am out of ideas so I am giving him that DVD and also perfume, But the perfume was something he had specifically asked me to get for him from the warehouse sale that I went to, so technically it could not be counted as a present.

I am so psyched!! Can't wait for Monday... I wanna hug him and kiss him... but I dunno if I would have the nerve to do so... maybe... I am so gonna need liquor... wish me luck! :)

By the way, tomorrow (11th) makes it exactly one year that I broke up with The Ex and one year that I have been single... Not too sure where he is or what he is doing... but I hope he's happy... okay, I don't, sue me... I hope he rot in purgatory but happily rotting in purgatory... hehehehe...