After Life

It's been a week since I saw #1 Crush. A week since his birthday. Ever since then, I got busy with work. And apparently, he is also very busy.

We've not talked. We've not YMed. We've not SMSed. Nothing.

I got worried. Something might've happened to him. I sent him one message last week and another this week. Both went unanswered. More worrying occurred.

Then yesterday, I accidentally blocked him on YM, ya know, while doing spring cleaning. Yes, I spring-clean my YM every now and then. Too many people on the list but I am not chatting that often...

Anyways, I just wanted to put him as offline but accidentally blocked him and he went missing from my YM. So I added him back. There was a sign on next to him name saying connection pending approval or something like that. By afternoon, that message was gone. That would mean he had approved me.

That would also mean he was online, at work and alive and well. And that would also mean he is ignoring my SMSes. He was also not chatting with me by choice. He was there in front of the computer and he could approve my request but he had no time to tell me that he was alright and that he was busy? Hmmm...

Anyways, now I am thinking that it's possible that whatever it is that I had with him have ended. Sigh. If only he'd tell me what's up. That it's over. Or that he truly is busy. Or he could no longer be friends with me. I was worried until the whole 'approve' thingy. Thought he was in an accident or sick or something...

Whatever it is, I have mentally prepared myself for the worst. Dayyymmmnnn. This time last year, I broke up with The Ex. Same time, different guy. Only this time, I am truly, madly, deeply in love with the guy. Sigh. Why can't these people wait until after my birthday to break up with me? I've never celebrated my birthday with the guy I am in love with... sigh...